Category Archives: Hockey

2 June 2011 – Goalie Duels, Grumpy Bears and Om Nom Nom

1. After an obscenely long eight-day wait, the Vancouver Canucks finally opened the Stanley Cup Final against the Boston Bruins with a dramatic last-minute victory in game one at Rogers Arena. This game had everything you could ask for, unless you’re a Bruins fan: a torrid pace to open the game, huge hits, spectacular goaltending, controversy (in the form of an alleged biting incident) and a great goal by Raffi Torres to win the game with 19 seconds remaining on the clock. Chances at both ends, blinding speed, hits galore… Stupendous penalty killing, spectacular goaltending, excellent emotion from both teams… Ed Willes at the Province called it “a dull, grinding affair”, only proving how out of touch sports writers tend to be. Don’t believe what you read, folks. And you, Mr Willes? If you’d rather watch Pass it to Bulis play Scrabble with Tanner Glass, then give your cushy press box seat to someone who enjoys hockey at its finest. Like me, you sour bastard. Continue reading 2 June 2011 – Goalie Duels, Grumpy Bears and Om Nom Nom

Seven Things about Hockey in Winnipeg

This post was originally published at The Hockey Writers

Chances are they will update this logo.

So Winnipeg is back in the NHL party, is it?

Mark Chipman’s work for the people of Manitoba has been remarkable. He’s been a huge figure on the Winnipeg scene, from programs for First Nations youth, girls and other community groups to traditional boys’ hockey; from lobbying provincial and federal politicians for new support to athletics and the arts, to building the rink that the new NHL team will inhabit; from a huge role in the 1996 Save the Jets campaign to the May 31, 2011 purchase of the Atlanta Thrashers. Continue reading Seven Things about Hockey in Winnipeg

1 June 2011 – Crazy Eyes, Power Forwards and Hoarseness

Citizens of Vancouver, after a long, long wait, it is finally upon us. We first learned of it last week, and details of its imminent arrival have been trickling in for days now. This event has not been to any Canadian cities, no matter how deserving. It’s gone to such warm-weather markets as California and Florida, much to the chagrin of prairie dwellers and mountain climbers alike. From west coast la-la-landers to Maritime good ol’ boys, we Canadians have been champing at the bit for this for far too long. That’s right: Real Housewives of Vancouver is coming to a disreputable television station near you.

Oh, and the Canucks are in the Stanley Cup Finals. Game one goes Wednesday June 1 at 5 PM. Here are Seven Things we want to see out of this series.

7. First, we want to see good hockey. The Canucks and Bruins lone meeting this year was one of the high points of the long regular season. The score was tied late into the third period, with both teams hitting, skating, and passing with the best of them. Ironically, considering their playoff woes on the power play, the Bruins’ winning goal that day came with the man advantage after a late, questionable penalty call. Milan Lucic had three points as the Bruins won 3-1.

The biggest D-man in the world versus the league’s deepest defensive corps. Some of the best pure power forwards in the game in Lucic, Ryan Kesler and Nathan Horton. The last two scoring champs in the Sedin twins. Two Vezina finalists in goal. Two teams that alternately score up a storm or shut the freakin’ door. This series should be playoff hockey at its finest, and a series long remembered regardless of the outcome.


6. Lots of hits would be nice. Whether it’s Raffi “Crazy Eyes” Torres sprinting the width of the ice to knock a defender on his ass, Keith Ballard cartwheeling someone with a picture perfect hip check or Alex Edler standing up a forward in the neutral zone, the Canucks have played their best hockey this post-season when they’ve worn down their opponents physically. Sure, the Bruins can dish it out too, but the Canucks are already the superior team in both top-end talent and depth; if they can wear out the Bruins best players, this series will be a quick one.

5. We want to see the Sedins shed their last critics. After ten NHL seasons, an Art Ross trophy and an Olympic gold medal apiece, a Hart trophy for Hank and a nomination for Dank, the Sedins still have their detractors among casual fans. Even more knowledgable fans, the ones who no longer refer to them as “soft”, or “sisters”, still sometimes criticize them for being too bland. (Obviously they don’t listen to Henrik in the post-game scrum very often. This guy’s sense of humour isn’t brash like Ryan Kesler’s bombing of teammate’s interviews – Hank is subtle, clever.)

Now is the twins’ time to shine. The wizardry that Henrik and Daniel display daily – the way they can dominate shift after shift with precision passing that boggles the mind – is something that needs to be seen regularly to be believed. Well, here you are, guys: a seven-game series in prime time, with nothing to distract the hockey fans of the world from the way you spin Zdeno Chara around so frequently he looks like the world’s tallest figure skater. Make us proud.

4. We really want to have nothing to bitch at the refs about. At the risk of sounding like a stereotypical Vancouverite, the refereeing in the conference finals left a lot to be desired. I’m not usually one to dwell overmuch on the officiating – I’m a carded umpire myself, so I know how athletes and fans tend to blame the zebras when a game goes the other way – but there have been some bizarrely called games this playoff. Game three of the Western Conference Final saw a staggering eleven minor penalties called against one team. Game four of that same series saw five straight penalties called against one team, before the seesaw tilted the other way in the form of three consecutive five-on-three powerplays. Game seven of the Eastern Conference Finals saw the other extreme, with no penalties called at all. For the record, that hadn’t happened in a playoff game in twenty-one years.

A happy medium would be appreciated in the finals. We recognize that not every minor stick infraction is going to be whistled down, but the officials need to find a balance between too many penalties and none at all. Just call the game fairly – call the penalties that should be called, and leave out the tickytack crap – and we’ll be fair to you too. Promise.

3. It would be great if centremen could take face-offs. My last bit on officiating – we hope – is on the linesmen. Can we PLEASE just drop the puck? It seems like more face-offs are contested by a winger and a centre, or two wingers, than are actually contested by the two people who lined up to take the draw in the first place. It’s ok to not throw a guy out EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

2. We need the Rogers Arena faithful to support the team as loud as they can. We tried, unsuccessfully, to secure tickets to game five. As we predicted in our podcast episode 32, we think game five is when the series will end. Since we can’t be there ourselves, we charge those lucky few who nabbed tickets to make Rogers Arena the fortress it should be. Our building is normally not nearly as loud as, for instance, the Bell Centre in Montreal. At game 3 against Nashville, a couple next to us sat silently through the entire game. They weren’t physically challenged – they walked to their seat and animatedly spoke on their cel phones during the intermissions – but they did not react to the game or the crowd even once through three periods of second round action. Unacceptable. You all paid massive amounts of money to be there. If you did not pay for your ticket, you ought to scream louder, dammit, even if – especially if – the Canucks are behind, or give your seat to a true hockey fan who’s been priced out of the building. Get up and yell until your voice is gone or you’ll be hearing from us again at the end of the series!

1. Finally, after what we think will be a great series, we want to see what will be one of the most touching moments in sports history. After all the artistry we’ve witnessed from Henrik Sedin over the last eleven years, we want to see him make the easiest pass of his career. We want to see the image that will supplant the photo of an exhausted Trevor Linden sharing defeat with goaltender Kirk MacLean after game seven in 1994. We want to see our captain hand the Stanley Cup to his twin brother Daniel.

28 May 2011 – Homecomings, Severed Fingers & Green Babies

7. Fitting that Milan Lucic would figure prominently in a tight-checking, hard-hitting Eastern Conference final game seven. Forget that the Lightning have three of the best pure scorers in the game. Ignore the fact that Dwayne Roloson had never lost an elimination game before Friday night. Hell, throw off the balcony the observation that Zdeno Chara and Martin St Louis are so disparate in size that anthropologists don’t consider them to be from the same species. Looch deserves the trip to the finals because he’s from Vancouver. He led theVancouver Giants to the city’s first Memorial Cup in eleventy million years. His maternal uncle played for theVancouver Canucks. What more do you need? This storyline writes its bad self. Continue reading 28 May 2011 – Homecomings, Severed Fingers & Green Babies

25 May 2011 -The Curse of the Presidents’ Trophy, Double OT & the Road to Hell

Seven Things – 25 May 2011

1. Before these playoffs began, much was said about the Vancouver Canucks and the Curse of the Presidents’ Trophy – which by the way would be a bitchin’ summer movie, unless of course it starred Nicolas Cage.

Nicolas Cage and the Curse of the Presidents’ Trophy

Anyway, since 1986, when that particular piece of bling was adopted for the top points-getter in the NHL regular season, just 7 of its 24 recipients have gone on to win the Stanley Cup. Loads of people predicted when the Canucks became the 25th team to be engraved upon the PT that they’d fall under that spell, too. “Look at Washington last year,” they crowed, “and San Jose before them.” Well look no longer, folks, because the stats are now on Vancouver’s side. Of the nine teams to win the Presidents’ Trophy and make the Stanley Cup finals, only two have lost. The Canucks not only have a red hot team with a solid roster going into the fourth round, they have 78% of historical precedent behind them. Continue reading 25 May 2011 -The Curse of the Presidents’ Trophy, Double OT & the Road to Hell

22 May 2011 – Sharks on the Brink, Records A-Falling, and Lightning Bolts at the Airport

Seven Things – 22 May 2011

1. The Vancouver Canucks rode their power play through much of the regular season. They were first overall in goals and had the best PP in the league this year; when they win, the man advantage very often is one of the main reasons. Sunday afternoon was no exception, as the Canucks scored three goals on two-man advantages in unusually quick succession. In fact, the buck fifty-five between the first and third goals broke the franchise record for the fastest three goals of any kind scored by the Canucks in a playoff game. I’ve yet to find any time in NHL history where three goals were scored by one team on the 5-on-3, let alone in under two minutes.

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Did I say the only reason? Because another solid part of the Canucks win in game four is explored in #5 below. Continue reading 22 May 2011 – Sharks on the Brink, Records A-Falling, and Lightning Bolts at the Airport

20 May 2011 – Penalties, More Penalties, and The Teal Men?

1. Game 3 of the Western Conference Final went tonight at the HP Pavilion in San Jose, and saw the Sharks climb back into the series with a 4-3 win over the Canucks. The score was flattering to the visitors, as the Sharks absolutely DOMINATED through 2 periods. The Canucks couldn’t string two passes together. They were outhustled, outworked, spent an entire period in the penalty box, managed only a couple of grade ‘A’ 5-on-5 scoring chances – which Antii Niemi was more than equal to – and generally deserved a much more lopsided defeat. Continue reading 20 May 2011 – Penalties, More Penalties, and The Teal Men?

19 May 2011 – The Twins, the Twins, and Some Old-Time Hockey

Seven Things – 19 May 2011

1. With a combined 2 goals and 5 points in game two, it’s official. The twins have arrived in the Western Conference final.

flashingthetwins

First of all, we now have a clearer idea what the hell Ben Eager was thinking as he took penalty after penalty after penalty in the third period as the Canucks lit the Sharks up for four power play goals. There are just two questions that come to mind:

  • Why the hell didn’t he just save us the trouble and call the ref’s mother a whore to get a 10-minute misconduct? He still gets the box time but doesn’t leave his team shorthanded for pretty much the entire period.
  • Why do the jerks always get the girl? Showing the Sedins, or Kevin Bieksa, or Chris Higgins your nipply bits would have made sense, mystery girl. But Ben Eager? He’s a drooling imbecile at the best of times – on Wednesday he was eye poppingly daft. Hardly deserving of the teat show. Continue reading 19 May 2011 – The Twins, the Twins, and Some Old-Time Hockey

18 May 2011 – Red Lights, Teenagers and Gordie Howe Hat Tricks

Seven Things – 18 May 2011

1. The Vancouver Canucks take an impressive 2-0 lead in the Western Conference final. Not impressive because they’re only two wins away from the third Cup final in team history, but impressive because of the way they’ve harpooned the Sharks late in both games. Both Vancouver and San Jose are big, imposing teams with deep rosters. The Canucks can keep those wheels moving at top speed for three full periods – the Sharks just can’t keep up that pace for two reasons. One: Ryan Kesler outskates Joe Thornton any night of the week. Two: Vancouver’s defense corps, from D-man #1 through D-man #6, is just too good at jumping into the play. Dan Boyle can’t do it all himself; the constant Canuck transition game just plain tires the Sharks out.You’ve gotta play a full 60 minutes, boys. Continue reading 18 May 2011 – Red Lights, Teenagers and Gordie Howe Hat Tricks

15 May 2011 – Linesmen, the Top Line, and the Incredible Invisible Defenseman

Seven Things – 15 May 2011

1. You wonder why the Vancouver – Nashville series was such a snooze? Not only do the Predators employ a stifling defensive game plan, it wasn’t until the sixth game that the two teams showed any kind of passion on the ice. By contrast, the Western Conference final started with both Joe Thornton and Ryan Kesler getting tossed from the opening freaking faceoff. These aren’t goons orchestrating a fight because they have no skills to back up the trash talk. These are hockey’s best, headbutting and jousting before the series even starts. Are you kidding me? Bring. It. On. This really is what we live for. Continue reading 15 May 2011 – Linesmen, the Top Line, and the Incredible Invisible Defenseman