18 May 2011 – Red Lights, Teenagers and Gordie Howe Hat Tricks

Seven Things – 18 May 2011

1. The Vancouver Canucks take an impressive 2-0 lead in the Western Conference final. Not impressive because they’re only two wins away from the third Cup final in team history, but impressive because of the way they’ve harpooned the Sharks late in both games. Both Vancouver and San Jose are big, imposing teams with deep rosters. The Canucks can keep those wheels moving at top speed for three full periods – the Sharks just can’t keep up that pace for two reasons. One: Ryan Kesler outskates Joe Thornton any night of the week. Two: Vancouver’s defense corps, from D-man #1 through D-man #6, is just too good at jumping into the play. Dan Boyle can’t do it all himself; the constant Canuck transition game just plain tires the Sharks out.You’ve gotta play a full 60 minutes, boys.

Shark Sushi” align=Games one and two have started as classic battles between the top two teams in the west. Each one has ended… well, they’ve ended like this. Image created by @pablopicante13.

2. Anybody got a spare red light bulb? Between the East and the West, games two featured 21 goals. Compare: in six games (and parts of three overtime periods), the Predators and Canucks scored a total of 29 goals. And it’s not like these third-round games were dogs – not by any means. Both were lights out. From Tampa’s opening minute goal to renewed Canuck Sedinery, from Kevin Bieksa’s Gordie Howe hat trick to Tim Thomas’s goal line stand at the buzzer, these games were something the NHL hasn’t seen in the third round of the playoffs in years: good, old-time, burn-the-barn-and-call-me-Jacques, end-to-flippin’-end hockey. Breakaways, giveaways, big saves and serious dangles; a 19-year-old with four points on one side, two Rocket Richard winners and an Art Ross winner stringing the puck around like icebound Globetrotters on the other; lots of shots, lots of hits, lots of saves, and lots of freakin’ goals – all at warp speed. The past two nights of hockey have been dizzying, they’ve been fun. Note to Barry Trotz: THIS IS HOW THE GAME SHOULD BE PLAYED.

Tyler Seguin” align=

3.

    • Boston power play against Montreal: zero for 21 (the first time in NHL history a team has won a 7-game series without scoring a single goal on the PP).
    • Boston power play against Philadelphia: two goals in four games.
    • Boston power play against Tampa Bay in game 2: two goals in six tries.

Sure, the Bruins are still the third worst among playoff teams this year, with a downright lousy 8.5% power play efficiency. But Tuesday night they doubled their output, going from just two goals in 41 chances to 4 in 47. Fans of the Leafs won’t understand this concept, seeing as they’re golfing right about now, but four is better than two.

4. The Vancouver Canucks and San Jose Sharks had to be licking their collective lips with the gong show passing for “defensive zone coverage” in game 2 of the Eastern final. Whether it’s Denis Seidenberg’s numerous missed assignments or Randy Jones and Victor Hedman waving at passing rookies, the Western teams will eviscerate the D on display last night. You know, for even more than the 11 goals that Tampa and Boston put up. Even more than the converted touchdown on display in Vancouver Wednesday. I said eviscerate.

(Article continued after the following sports-related ad content, which you really ought to read.)


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(Okay, now back to your regularly scheduled chicanery.)

Logan Couture.” align=5. On consecutive nights, rookies split opposition defensive pairs before scoring on stellar Vezina finalist goaltenders. Put Seguin’s first goal Tuesday up against Logan Couture’s gorgeous Wednesday game-opener for the Sharks, and you’ve got a tough choice for highlight of the week. The best part? We get to watch these two guys play hockey for the next 15 years. You ain’t seen nothin’ yet.

6. How often do you see a defenseman score? In the playoffs? On a breakaway? Game-in, game-out, Kevin Bieksa is making his case for Conn Smythe consideration. Sure, Ryan Kesler leads the playoffs in scoring, but most of those points came in one six-game stretch against Nashville. Bieksa has been one of the team’s best since training camp. In game two against San Jose, everything came together. He goaded Patrick Marleau into a second period scrap, which consequently turned Shark Ben Eager into a foaming mess. After Eager drooled his idiot sauce all over the penalty box, the Canucks had blown game two wide open. Credit Bieksa with a goal, an assist, a fight and the mental edge over their foes from NoCal. Keep in mind, Kevin Bieksa is an unrestricted free agent as of July 1. That’s right: brutha gon’ get paid…

7. Jokes about needing a goalie have been standard fare in Philly since Ron Hextall’s bald spot vacated the Flyers crease. Most have been uninspired at best. That’s why I’m thrilled to bring you this gem from Gorilla Upskirt, as posted by the biggest bully in the yard himself, Broad Street Hockey. It’s funny because it’s true.

Wanted: One Goalie