Somebody Approved This: Vancouver Millionaires

Chris wearing the jersey he’s so thoroughly dissing.

Jersey: The maroon jersey of the 1915 Stanley Cup champion Vancouver Millionaires.

Years worn: 1911-1926 by the Millionaires.
November 20, 2008 by the Vancouver Giants.
March 16, 2013 by the Vancouver Canucks.

Reaction: Almost unanimously positive. People like them some retro jerseys.

Most famous players to wear it: Fred “Cyclone” Taylor.

Why it’s great: The colour scheme is unique, I guess. I can’t remember anyone else wearing maroon and cream since the Millionaires folded. Having a colour scheme that nobody else thought would be a good idea is a positive, right?

Why it’s garbage: It looks like someone tried to TP the Canucks but was interrupted before they got to the torso. And the pants! With all the guys in identical red hats and white pants, I wasn’t sure if I was watching a hockey game or a Pet Shop Boys music video. Oh, and the logo? Can someone find me a Windows 95 PC so I can mock that thing up in MS Paint, then build me a time machine so I can go be a graphic designer in 1910? Thanks.

Haiku to describe Chris’s feelings whenever he sees this jersey:
This is the wrong way
To do red and white shirts. The
Right way won 5-2.

Other jerseys we can’t believe somebody approved:
New York Islanders third jersey (rumoured), 2012
Seattle Sounders third jersey, 2012
Vancouver Canucks alternate jersey, 1995-1997




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