Tag Archives: Islanders

Remember Steve Bernier?

Longtime followers of Pucked in the Head might remember that we started out as a podcast called Bernier is a Turd. That was back when Steve Bernier was an overpaid roster spot holder for the Vancouver Canucks. We frequently complained that Mr Turd was a sorry excuse for a hockey forward, and accused him of being a garbage goalmonger of the very worst sort. “He can only score if he’s standing in the crease,” we lamented, “and only then, with no goaltender between him and the goal line.”

Theory: Steve Bernier can only score from here, just not when that guy with the pads is there.
Theory: Steve Bernier can only score from here, just not when that guy with the pads is there.

Turns out we were half wrong.

Bernier now plies his trade in the American Hockey League, for the New York Islanders affiliate Bridgeport Sound Tigers. As the Hartford Wolf Pack pressed to tie a 3-2 game late in the third period, our man Steve lay down, angling his shin pads just so, to block a point shot from Ryan Graves. The puck bounced, ricocheted, rebounded, even caromed the length of the ice into the Hartford net. There was indeed no goaltender, as the Pack had opted for an extra attacker. But we admit — Bernier can, indeed, hit the net from outside the crease.

You can’t say he didn’t do it on purpose.

If you liked this, check out our Weird Goals post. Oh, and its sequel, Weird Goals II.

 

Episode 61: Round One Chatter

After unanimously anointing the Vancouver Canucks as round two participants in the last podcast — thereby sending the Calgary Flames into the wasteland of central Alberta golf courses — Russell and Jason break down the seven remaining series.

• Shoddy math
• Next World by the Orchid Highway
• Arbuthnit? Arbuthnet? Arbuth… Russell, anyway
• The Seven Deadly Sins
• Montreal Canadiens versus Ottawa Senators
• A little playoff trivia fo’ ya
• New York Islanders vs Washington Capitals
• Tampa Bay Lightning vs Detroit Red Wings
• New York Rangers vs Pittsburgh Penguins
• Nashville Predators vs Chicago Blackhawks
• Jason & Russell make it interesting
• Anaheim Ducks vs Winnipeg Jets
• St Louis Blues vs Minnesota Wild
• Bonus fantasy Anaheim vs Minny, StL vs Jets content
• Russell stopped listening a while ago
• William Tell Overture by Russell ArbuthNOT
• William Tell Overture by random symphony orchestra
• Thanks for listening

Don't like our choices? Fill out this bad boy your bad self!
Don’t like our choices? Fill out this bad boy your bad self!

It’s going to be a loooooooong summer

Whatever playoff aspirations still existed in the Vancouver Canucks dressing room — misguided, maybe, but they were there — must have taken a serious thumping during the third period of last night’s 7-4 loss to the lowly, John Tavares-less New York Islanders.

Up 3-0 going into the final 20 minutes of the game, the Canucks managed to give up a converted touchdown in a single period for the first time since a kid named Wayne Gretzky swaggered into Vancouver with the dynastic Edmonton Oilers. And, as Ryan Kesler said of the present-day Islanders after the game, “let’s face it, [New York] is not one of the top teams in the NHL. We had a three-nothing lead to start the third. This just can’t happen.”

Sadly, not only can it go down, Mr Kesler, but it did happen.  On home ice. During the stretch run. Less than a week after the GM traded away a future Hall of Fame goaltender.

Eddie Lack may be giving himself the evil eye in the mirror this morning, but chances are new Canucks backup goaltender Jacob Markstrom is eyeing him and his crease even more closely. Photo by Jason Kurylo for Pucked in the Head.
Eddie Lack may be giving himself the evil eye in the mirror this morning, but chances are new Canucks backup goaltender Jacob Markstrom is eyeing him and his crease even more closely. Photo by Jason Kurylo for Pucked in the Head.

In the first two periods, the Isles had just nine shots on goal. Fast forward twenty minutes, and they had nearly that many goals.

Sure, there were positives. Henrik Sedin got a lucky bounce off an Islander defenceman — lucky bounces have been few and far between for the Canucks of late, but it marked the first goal in 23 games for the captain. Alex Burrows didn’t get off the gorilla-choking, gut-twisting schneid he’s been riding all season, but he did get awarded an apple on Ryan Kesler’s 22nd goal of the year. Replays show Burrows gave a swing and a miss when Kevin Bieksa’s shot from the slot pinged off the post, but when Kesler put it home, the scorekeepers gave Burr the phantom assist for his 300th career NHL point.

But let’s not kid anyone. There are no moral victories in a game that goes that far south that quickly. Less than five minutes of gutless, idiot play in the third period undid 40 minutes of solid two-way hockey. Dumb penalties from Jensen, Bieksa and Sestito translated into a tie game within minutes of the third period puck drop. Add a couple that Lack would like to have back, and the Isles put a pick-six on the board before the third was halfway done.

The Canucks collapse, though, wasn’t half as scary as what awaited Eddie Lack in the dressing room.

ZOMBIE GALLAGHER!!! SAVE YOURSELF!!!

Somebody Approved This: New York Islanders 2013 Third Jersey

In an age of hyper marketing, intense competition and tightly controlled PR, it’s amazing that truly horrible ideas can still make it past the brainstorming stage. Whether it’s the nightmare of design by committee or just a conflagration of mediocre talents pulling the wool over the eyes of out of touch rich CEOs, we occasionally see awful designs rolled out in an underwhelming explosion of anticlimax. Today, we analyze the most recent NHL obscenity with the introduction of a new Seven Things series: Somebody Approved This.

Note: This fugly spittoon shirt was originally leaked — or is that leaked upon? — as a proposed third jersey in 2011-12. We wrote it up then as the ugliest thing to come out of Long Island, and remember these clowns wore the teal and orange fishermen a while back. Sadly the lockout didn’t allow Charles Wang and his wandering minstrels of woe quite enough time to rejig the damned thing. Consequently, Isles fans are being forced to watch not only a crappy team, but a crappy team in disgusting uniforms.

More, including the always-entertaining Withers Haiku, after the break. Continue reading Somebody Approved This: New York Islanders 2013 Third Jersey