Category Archives: Articles

100 years? [Insert Leafs joke here]

It’s been a full century since Vancouver won a Stanley Cup. On March 26, 1915, the Denman Arena saw the Vancouver Millionaires, led by Fred “Cyclone” Taylor,  complete a three-game sweep over the Ottawa Senators for the city’s only claim to hockey’s holy grail. One hundred years later, the Vancouver Canucks will wear their maroon tribute jerseys against the Colorado Avalanche.

Team picture of the 1914 Vancouver Millionaires
The Millionaires are famously the only Vancouver team to win the Stanley Cup, which they did in 1915. Note the one player in the back row wearing an earlier version of the jersey. Archive photo retrieved from an AskJeeves search.

The Canucks have made three trips to the finals since their NHL debut in 1970, but have come up short each time. The first was in 1982, a four-game sweep at the hands Al Arbour’s mighty New York Islanders. The second and third, in 1994 and 2011, both went to seventh and deciding games that went to the New York Rangers and Boston Bruins respectively. That leaves the 1915 champs the only ones to have the word ‘Vancouver’ inscribed into Lord Stanley’s chalice.

Hockey Hall of Famer Frank Patrick wearing the 1913 Vancouver Millionaires uniform.
Frank Patrick pioneered the blue line, the penalty shot and the idea of dressing a backup goaltender. He was also a huge early force in establishing women’s hockey on the West Coast. I don’t know about you folks, but I truly dig using bones to make the Vancouver V. (Also, dock skates!) Archive photo gleaned from a Bing search.

 

Roberto Luongo, Tom Sestito and Daniel Sedin in Vancouver Millionaires heritage uniforms.
Many suggest that Roberto Luongo would still be in Vancouver had John Tortorella started him for the 2014 Heritage Classic at BC Place. Even during the game, Lu was leaning his way out of town, and Daniel was all, “I canNOT believe we didn’t play him.” Seriously. Tom Sestito skated in the Heritage Classic, but Roberto Luongo did not. Way to go, Torts. Hilarious bench photo stolen from a Cuil search.

 

Roberto Luongo wearing his Vancouver Millionaires heritage mask.
Swipe right, Torts, swipe RIGHT!

 

Giants set for home finale

The Vancouver Giants end their 2014-15 season this weekend with a home-and-home against Kelowna, the top team in the Western Conference. While the Giants are out of the playoff picture thanks to a nine-game losing skid down the stretch, the Rockets have been on auto-pilot the past six weeks or so in preparation for a long playoff run.

Get ticket information for Friday night’s game here.

Cody Porter has had good games and bad, but you can't place all the blame for the Giants season on his rookie shoulders. Photo by Jason Kurylo for Pucked in the head.
Cody Porter has had good games and bad, but you can’t place all the blame for the Giants season on his rookie shoulders. Photo by Jason Kurylo for Pucked in the head.

It was a roller coaster year for the Giants, who came out of the gate flying before losing 18 of 24 games under Troy G Ward. Replacement coach Claude Noel seemed to buoy the team nicely — a new bench boss often has an invigorating effect — and with four weeks left in the year they’d managed to scrape themselves into a playoff spot.

Click here for a slideshow of photos from WHL action.

Continue reading Giants set for home finale

Sports’ Biggest Fallacy

Whitecaps Wednesday

A win is a win is a win. Except when it isn’t.

“Now hold on a second, Russell! That doesn’t make any sense! How can a win not be a win?” Lend me your attention for a moment fine reader and I’ll be happy to explain.

After three months of inactivity, I've got the okay to pull the Rackets & Runners shirt (and the cheesy running selfies) out of mothballs.
Pucked in the Head’s fearless leader Jason Kurylo is seen here trying to outrun logic and reason. If you look closely, you can spot his overactive moistical gland in full production.

On March 14, we saw the Vancouver Whitecaps escape Toyota Park with a 1-0 result over the Chicago Fire. I watched this game while a wave of frustration bombarded me with each squandered scoring opportunity.

Sure, the Whitecaps notched their first triumph of the infantile MLS season this weekend. I’d suggest that many of you were in fact quite happy to see the Whitecaps find the victory in Chicago on Saturday. It’s not out of the question that you were placated by the fact that the Whitecaps FC had never scored a goal at Toyota Park. And many of you probably defaulted to using the aforementioned “a win is a win” cliché as some type of reasoning for arriving at your satisfaction in seeing the Caps win. (I’m looking at YOU, Kurylo).

Continue reading Sports’ Biggest Fallacy

Episode 58 – What jerseys not to wear

When you think high fashion, you think Pucked in the Head. I mean, Chris Withers alone owns the most colourful questionable jersey collection jersey collection this side of the Mississippi amongst the three main contributors to this website.

In this cast of pod, those other two PITH-y pinheads drone on about colour schemes and logo design until they’ve painted themselves into a Peyote Coyote corner. (Note, no peyote was used during the preparation or recording of this particular episode. Maybe that was the problem?)

* Intro
* Sofa Surfer Girl by the Orchid Highway
* LA Kings paper curtains
* Canucks Hallowe’en Flying Vees
* Workmarks bite hockey bag as a rule
* Best of the best
* WTF, Ducks?
* Now that you mention it, WTF, California?
* Do you seriously want to go into other sports?
* Never have a cartoon mascot leap out of the jersey
* The Peyote Coyote: ugly jersey, funky shirt, or both?
* You can’t leave without dissing the Buffaslug
* Kill all the mustard yellow
* Adios, muchachos
* Time for a Change by the Orchid Highway

Each and every one gets a passing grade from the likes of Chris Withers, so Russell Arbuthnot and Jason Kurylo decided to chat some hockey fashion in Episode 58.
Each and every one gets a passing grade from the likes of Chris Withers, so Russell Arbuthnot and Jason Kurylo decided to chat some hockey fashion in Episode 58.

On the long-term stability of MLS

In December, in Don Garber’s state of the league address, the Major League Soccer commissioner made an astounding claim: MLS clubs were collectively losing over $100 million per season. The announcement was widely scoffed at, and seen as posturing ahead of the upcoming collective bargaining negotiations.

As someone who once flirted with an accounting career, going so far as getting a diploma before realizing how bored I was preparing myself to be for the rest of my life, I know that the profits or losses a company declares in its financial statements don’t necessarily equate to cash gains or losses. That said, it’s discordant to see MLS simultaneously crying poor and announcing multi-million dollar signings of players like Steven Gerrard, Jozy Altidore and Sebastian Giovinco. I’m going to do something in this article I don’t usually do: take MLS at its word. The league is in awful shape, losing over $100 million per year, and its solution is to keep buying increasingly more expensive players. Is this a good strategy?

Is the acquisition of players of Jermain Defoe's quality good for the long-term stability of MLS?
Is the acquisition of players of Jermain Defoe’s quality good for the long-term stability of MLS?

First, let’s look at who these expensive players are, and how much they’re making. We’re going to look at 2014 numbers, because it’s obviously too early to know what effect the latest crop of players will have on the league. Here is every player that made $1 million or more in 2014:

  • LAG – Landon Donovan ($4,583,333)
  • LAG – Omar Gonzalez ($1,250,000)
  • LAG – Robbie Keane ($4,500,000)
  • MON – Marco DiVaio ($2,500,000)
  • NER – Jermaine Jones ($3,252,500)
  • NYRB – Tim Cahill ($3,625,000)
  • NYRB – Thierry Henry ($4,350,000)
  • ORL – Kaka* ($7,167,500)
  • POR – Liam Ridgewell ($1,200,000)
  • SEA – Clint Dempsey ($6,695,189)
  • SEA – Obafemi Martins ($1,753,333)
  • TOR – Michael Bradley ($6,500,000)
  • TOR – Jermain Defoe ($6,180,000)
  • TOR – Gilberto Junior ($1,205,000)
  • VAN – Pedro Morales ($1,410,900)
    *It’s not clear how much of Kaka’s salary was paid by Orlando, as he was loaned to Sao Paulo, but again let’s take the numbers provided at their word.
Obafemi Martins is one of only 15 players in the league making over $1 million. Photo by Jason Kurylo for Pucked in the Head.
Obafemi Martins is one of only 15 players in the league making over $1 million. Photo by Jason Kurylo for Pucked in the Head.

Only nine out of twenty-one clubs had a million-dollar player on their roster in 2014. (We’re counting Orlando and NYCFC because the player’s union says they had guys earning salaries.) Only four had more than one.  In total, fifteen players, spread over fewer than half of the league’s clubs, accounted for just over $56 million dollars in salary, or over half of the league’s losses. Is the league likely to recoup these losses?

Let’s start with the largest cash infusion in the league’s history: its new domestic television deal worth an estimated $90 million per year. This type of money likely isn’t thrown at the league without the star power of some of the names in the above list. Subtracting the money from the previous TV deal, we can expect the league to offset about $60 million of its losses just on new TV money in 2015. More, if Sky Sports paid anything significant for the rights to broadcast two games a week in the UK. As terms of the UK deal, unlike the domestic rights deal, were not disclosed, I am assuming Sky did not need to pay much, and MLS was happy enough just getting their product on British television. We’re down to a $40 million shortfall.

Now things get slightly murkier. How much of an effect do players of this calibre have on attendance? This is difficult to measure, because winning tends to have a positive effect on attendance and it’s difficult to pin how much of a team’s success is attributable to its most expensive players. The Galaxy, for instance, brought in Robbie Keane in 2011 and saw a nearly 2,000/game bump in attendance, but they were riding a 2010 Supporters Shield victory, and won a second one in 2011. How much of that attendance bump is “oooh, Robbie Keane” and how much is “oooh, I like winning teams.” Let’s see how the rest of the clubs fared.

  • Montreal signed Di Vaio in 2012 and saw diminishing attendance for the two years thereafter.
  • New England’s attendance increased by about 1,850/game, but they didn’t win the Jermaine Jones lottery until September.
  • New York saw their attendance soar by about 6,000/game when they signed Henry in 2010. The arrival of Tim Cahill in 2012 did not have a similar effect; the club lost 1,800 fans that year.
  • Portland has seen attendance increase every year, but that’s as much due to capacity increases and pent-up demand as it is Liam Ridgewell.
  • Seattle experienced a small spike in their first half-season, and a small decrease in their first full season, after the additions of Dempsey and Martins. They’re up about 500/game in total.
  • Toronto lured back 4,000 disenfranchised supporters with their bloody big off-season spending spree in 2014.
  • Vancouver saw a modest 400/game bump after Pedro Morales was added.

Let’s be generous here and say that those attendance bumps are permanent over the contract of the player. You’re going to get maybe 10,000 more butts in seats league-wide, on average, which translates to $12-15 million in extra revenue, depending on the average ticket price of the clubs doing the buying. In the best-case scenario, we’re still left with at least a $25 million shortfall.

Now how generous do you want to get with things like merchandise? Let’s assume every one of those 10,000 extra attendees buys a jersey for their new favourite player. At $140 for a customized jersey and (pure guesswork here) a 30% markup. You’re talking less than half a million dollars in extra revenue. In fact, you would need to sell 773,755 extra jerseys (at my guesstimate figures) to make up the shortfall.

Colour me extremely skeptical that the league is managing to approach breakeven on these players.

So how much of a problem does the league have? Its single-entity nature means the league can distribute its losses somewhat, and it’s probably only going to average a $1-2 million loss per club. The problem, though, is the league is setting itself up to be similar to a European league, with a small number of dominant teams at the top spending all the money and getting all the results. Look at the champions since the league started loosening restrictions and allowing multiple Designated Players: three out of the last four Supporters Shields and MLS Cups have been won by clubs with more than one millionaire salary. In the big European leagues this works ok. There are other things to play for. Relegation battles, cup competitions that the big clubs don’t always take too seriously, the prospect of Champions or Europa League play if you can get hot and sneak into the top five for a year. In MLS you have a race to the bottom for the right to draft next year’s stand-out NCAA player. Woohoo.

After the 2014 season, Chivas USA became the third franchise to fold in MLS' 19 years of existence. Photo by Jason Kurylo for Pucked in the Head.
After the 2014 season, Chivas USA became the third franchise to fold in MLS’ 19 years of existence. Photo by Jason Kurylo for Pucked in the Head.

I worry that we’re seeing the effects. The league has just folded its third franchise in only nineteen years of existence. Rumours are swirling that season ticket sales in Montreal were horrendously bad, though perhaps their dramatic upset win in the Champions League quarterfinals will improve that somewhat. A glance at the stands in Houston, Dallas, DC and even Philadelphia shows that many clubs can’t even sell out their barn for opening day. The TV numbers league-wide remain terrible.

This is a league that once enjoyed modest success and growth with their devotion to parity. Nine different teams won the Supporters’ Shield in the league’s first thirteen seasons. Eight different clubs won MLS Cup over the same period. There was a reasonable chance that even if your club sucked one year, it could be good again the next. The league has gone away from  that and it’s not at all clear that a lack of parity is in the best interests of anybody but a select few clubs.

Too Much, Too Soon

The Whitecaps started their 2015 season off with a bang. And ended their first game with a resounding thud. It was a tale of two halves, at least I think that’s how soccer games work, and on this day, the fans at BC Place saw two entirely different Whitecaps’ teams depending on which 45 you watched.

The first half looked like what we have had been told to expect this season from the blue and white – a fast-paced group, intent on spreading the ball around and utilizing their speed to overwhelm their opponents. The Whitecaps’ attack produced a number of quality chances, yet were only able to capitalize on one of them.

Marie Hui sings the national anthem prior to the Vancouver Whitecaps season opener. Sadly, the home team lost their 2015 home opener to the dirty, rotten, stinkin' doughbugs of TFC 3-1. Photo by Jason Kurylo for Pucked in the Head.
Marie Hui sings the national anthem prior to the Vancouver Whitecaps season opener. Sadly, the home team lost their 2015 home opener to the dirty, rotten, stinkin’ doughbugs of TFC 3-1. Photo by Jason Kurylo for Pucked in the Head.

Coach Carl Robinson liked what he saw, but post-game he conceded that perhaps that type of phrenetic pace isn’t one that can be maintained over a full 90 minutes. That, coupled with a tactical change at the break by Toronto head coach Greg Vanney, turned the game upside down and what appeared to be a potent Whitecaps attack suddenly looked more like a woodpecker taking a steel pole to task. Not much progress and one helluva headache.

Toronto took control in the second half, watching the Whitecaps attempt the soccer-equivalent of the dump and chase time and time again. The TFC defenders took a few large steps backwards and simply watched the balls come, abandoning any semblance of chasing. Yet the Caps seemed content to fire away and perhaps oblivious to the fact that it simply wasn’t working.

Let’s take a look at the highlights, the lowlights, and the limelight in the Caps’ 3-1 loss on Saturday.

Continue reading Too Much, Too Soon

The March to March – Part 6

Whitecaps Wednesday

Another Wednesday, another Whitecaps. Put those two things together and you have a sentence that makes editors break out into cold sweats, and Whitecaps Wednesday. So welcome, and please, make yourself at home whilst I stride this towel over to Jason with which to wipe his moisty brow.

Jason, when confronted with grammatical errors and slightly before the moistiness sets in.
Jason, displaying his reaction when confronted with grammatical errors and pointing to his moistical gland, which moisties his brow.

This is the latest edition of the March to March, bringing the total now to six. SIX! Can you believe it? I don’t even own six pairs of underwear (what proud, decent man does though), yet here I am punching out a sextuple of Whitecaps Wednesday pieces. You probably can’t even count them all on one hand anymore! And if you can, colour me impressed.

August is a busy month for Caps, who manage to squeeze five games into five weeks. That means five airtight predictions in which you can only yearn to store your favourite sandwiches. Click on to read on, friend.

Continue reading The March to March – Part 6

Episode 57 — The peanut butter mullet, a do as old as time

A podcast episode in which Rusell and Jason ride the peanut butter mullet wave of Jaromir Jagr’s career into a discussion of the Canucks, ex-Canucks and Canucks that never were.

• Introduction
• Sofa Surfer Girl by the Orchid Highway
• False start / Rubber Ducky
• Jaromir Jagr’s 8th NHL team
• Holy hairstyles, this guy has scored a ton of points
• Whence the scoring after the twins & Vrbata?
• The Canucks 2nd power play unit is embarrassing
• Vrbata probably won’t make 30 goals
• No Cup since 1967 — Russell blames Phil Kessel
• Thanks to CIVL Radio
• Time for a Change by the Orchid Highway

The travelling Jagrs in their mulletted glory (pictured here before New Jersey or Florida were in the mix). Photo pinched from an Ask Jeeves search.
The travelling Jagrs in their mulletted glory (pictured here before New Jersey or Florida were in the mix). Photo pinched from an Ask Jeeves search.

 

A gimme for the Game of Thrones marketing people

Just prior to last week’s Stadium Series — which saw the LA Kings continue their remarkable second-half winning streak with a 2-1 decision over the mysteriously mediocre San Jose Sharks — one of the Levi’s Stadium webcams got a jealous visit from a territorial black bird. No, not Patrick Kane. C’mon, Game of Thrones people. This footage is a freakin’ freebie.

As for the game, it was all right I suppose. Both of these teams can play something resembling hockey when you give them the chance. The Kings, after eight wins in nine tries, now sit third in the Pacific Division, tied with the Calgary Flames with a game in hand. The Sharks are going the other way — they’ve got just seven points in their last ten games.

Whatever. Even on a balmy California night, I don’t see the appeal behind paying a premium to sit in a baseball stadium to watch puck. The front row is hundreds of feet from the boards, for crying out loud.

Photoshop mangling by Jason Kurylo, who sobbed, 'I could work in film and television post production, I just know I could.'
Photoshop mangling by Jason Kurylo, who sobbed, ‘I could work in film and television post production, I just know I could.’

The March to March – Part 5

Whitecaps Wednesday

Whitecaps Wednesday spent last week in Harrison Hot Springs, dodging village-wide gas leaks and a hearty collection of bed bugs (thanks Ramada Hotels). Luckily, the Caps just officially released what most have expected for a while now: a brand spankin’ new kit, so the previous one, now infested with little creepy crawlies, has found a new home in the firepit.

bed_bug_stuffed_f1559
Truth be told, Jason wanted me to include an actual photo of the bed bugs I discovered wile on vacation. I couldn’t expose my valued readers to that, so here is the least repulsive bed bug photo I could find from a google image search. You’re welcome.

When we last checked in on the Whitecaps, they were mired in a long stretch of games away from Vancouver and, despite dropping their last game of the month, managed to acquit themselves well overall. July sees them in familiar territory, that is away from theirs, as they finally wrap up their road trip before heading home.

Read on for results!
Continue reading The March to March – Part 5